Search found 12 matches

by Epignosis
Sun Apr 11, 2021 8:45 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Epignosis wrote: Sun Dec 20, 2020 10:11 am Queen Pink Categories:

1. A Suicide Song. A song about killing yourself.
2. An Art Song. A song that inspires you to make art.
3. A Timeless Song. A song that no matter how much your hear it it never gets old.
4. A Treasure Song. A song that represents your treasure.

motobot Categories:

5. Alcoholism. I want a song that reminds me of people with alcohol addiction.
6. Crime. A Song about crime.
7. School. A Song that makes you think about school.
8. Food. A Song that makes you want food.

PM your links to me here, and let's try to have them by 12/30.

Scores

MacDougall =_______ 7.0 + 8.5 + 8.5 + 4.5 + 6.0 + 6.0 + 4.0 + 5.0 = 49.5
Marmot =___________ 7.0 + 5.5 + 9.0 + 4.0 + 6.0 + 9.0 + 7.0 + 5.5 = 53
G-Man =____________ 7.0 + 7.0 + 5.0 + 6.0 + 5.0 + 6.5 + 6.5 + 6.0 = 49
nutella =__________ 6.0 + 5.5 + 8.0 + 8.0 + 7.5 + 7.0 + 6.5 + 7.5 = 56
nijuukyugou =______ 7.0 + 6.0 + 7.0 + 3.5 + 6.5 + 7.5 + 6.0 + 7.0 = 50.5
Boomslang =________ 5.0 + 6.0 + 5.5 + 7.0 + 7.0 + 5.0 + 6.5 + 4.5 = 46.5
MyNameisNothing =__ 7.5 + 5.5 + 3.0 + 3.0 + 6.5 + 6.0 + 7.5 + 6.0 = 45
dunya = ___________ 6.0 + 6.5 + 2.5 + 8.0 + 8.0 + 7.5 + 6.5 + 8.5 = 53.5
Epignosis =________ 7.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 8.5 + 7.5 + 7.0 + 6.5 = 59.5
TonyStarkPrime =___ 5.5 + 4.0 + 3.5 + 6.5 + 5.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 6.0 = 46
birdwithteeth11 =__ 2.0 + 4.0 + 1.0 + 6.5 + 4.0 + 5.0 + 2.0 + 5.0 = 29.5
by Epignosis
Sun Apr 11, 2021 1:56 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Crime
Spoiler: show
Dead Kennedys - Stealing People's Mail

birdwithteeth11
Moto = 2
What a porch pirate! This sounds like gibberish.
QP = 2
This song gets better the more you turn the volume down. At least it’s very short, so there’s that. The only reason I know what the crime is is because of the title.
Epi = 2
I have enough credit card offers and fast food coupons, thanks.

Taemin – “Criminal”

MyNameIsNothing
Moto = 7
Sounds like a psychopath. I probably would like the song more if I knew the language.
QP = 8
Sounds like a guy in a mental hospital. I kind of liked how it was in a different language. It was cool and makes it stand out from the other songs.
Epi = 7.5
This is why I don’t do K-Pop music videos. I don’t have a tuxedo and a suit of chainmail just lying around. Also, I’m not Korean (my neighbor is though).

Hozier - Arsonist’s Lullabye

nutella
Moto = 7
I think he’s insane. Did he set fire to his clothes? This is a mediocre song for me. The noises sound sustained.
QP = 6
With the fire and demons in the lyrics, the drums made me think of a dragon pounding around.
Epi = 6.5
My first year teaching, I had an arsonist for a student. Smartest kid in the class, but he had it out for mailboxes. No joke.

The Traveling Wilburys – “Last Night”

nijuukyugou
Moto = 8
Right off the bat, this has me thinking of beach music. The voice was nice a soft. Their voices together are harmonious. Wow, this lady is greedy. It gets repetitive at the end.
QP = 4
Kind of repetitive in the chorus if you ask me. These guys need a new stylist.
Epi = 6
After typing it out I had to delete not one but TWO “Ls” in the band name. Damn British.

Damien rice - 9 Crimes

dunia
Moto = 6
At first I thought I would like it because of how soft it was. I was expecting it to get louder but it didn’t.
QP = 7
So sad. I felt like it was so simple there’s not much to say about it.
Epi = 6.5
The tenth crime is using the vi-IV-I-V chord progression.


Dire Straits – “Private Investigations”

Epi
Moto = 7
I appreciate the spoken word aspect of this. It gives me the feel of a wild west showdown. Great song!
QP = 7
I kept expecting Zorro to crash through here, but he never came. We like the classical guitar.
Epi = 7
Yes, I can quite picture the masked vigilante leaping deftly across London, whipping his way up the walls of Buckingham Palace to defend the besmirched Markle honour.

Jane's Addiction – “Been Caught Stealing”

MacDougall
Moto = 4
The tune of the voice is rough. I don’t have anything else to say. Didn’t like it.
QP = 4
Was that girl Zorro in the video? There was too much yelling.
Epi = 4

The Dear Hunter – “Mr. Usher (On His Way to Town)”

Boomslang
Moto = 7
I get Cuphead vibes. Good song! The voices are great. The piano instrumental is attractive.
QP = 6
Sounds like a knockoff of “Fly Me to the Moon.” I do like vocals when the main singer is a boy and the backup singers are girls.
Epi = 6.5
I like The Dear Hunter, but I can’t keep up with them. I know that’s a me problem.

Violent Femmes - “Country Death Song”

G-Man
Moto = 7
Nice country voice. It gets dark.
QP = 5
This is what I would expect a horse to sound like.
Epi = 6
Dropping this Friday: “Boxer’s Blues” – Black Beauty ft. Mr. Ed


Merle Haggard - Mama Tried

TonyStarkPrime
Moto = 8
I like country! I like it when the sound gets stronger. I like the soft voice of the singer.
QP = 7
Mama must be like, “I failed as a parent.” The country lead works well.
Epi = 7.5

Supertramp – “Crime of the Century”

Marmot
Moto = 6
I don’t like how the drums get loud when the singer shouts. Nice electric guitar. The instrumental section is good. Decent submission.
QP = 8
This song is like a big dramatic part of a movie when they’re about to conquer something big and the movie is about to be over. On a side now, I like the picture. (Editor’s note: She likes the sleeve.)
Epi = 7
That’s right folks. This son of a bitch should have been the soundtrack to Braveheart. What does that hack James Horner know?
by Epignosis
Sun Apr 11, 2021 1:54 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Alcoholism
Spoiler: show
Kendrick Lamar – “Swimming Pools (Drank)”

birdwithteeth11
Moto = 4
I don’t like the voice, but this song would go good in a thug movie. I hate the “drank” part and I don’t like how it talks at the end.
QP = 6
*Makes it rain*. I feel like I’m at the club. The end is like they’re on a phone call.
Epi = 5
Okay, Microsoft Word underlined “thug” and advised me, “Using neutral language here would be more inclusive.” What if I’m trying to include thugs? I wonder what other words Word will call me out on…

The Streets - Too Much Brandy

Boomslang
Moto = 4
The singer’s voice is pretty bad and the music was very jarring.
QP = 6
At the club again. I don’t care for this overall, but I liked the lighter part. I didn’t hear much that the singer said except “fast food” and “long johns.” It was unclear.
Epi = 5
Simon’s a fan.

Kah-Lo & Riton – “Fake I.D. “


MyNameisNothing
Moto = 5
I agree with my sister, only I wouldn’t want to go even if I was.
QP = 7
This sounds like a grown-up party that I’m not invited to.
Epi = 6
I’m broke and I don’t dance. *Fuck*

Mussorgsky - Pictures at an Exhibition - XIV. The Hut on Fowl's Legs (Baba-Yagá)

nijuuukyugou
Moto = 7
This gives me a Nutcracker feel. I like the crescendo, when the sound gets bigger.
QP = 8
“Where’s the army? Where are they invading from?” Yep, definitely Nutcracker. This is the part when the mouse king comes in!
Epi = 7.5
Holy shit. You would think the only classical music I’ve exposed my children to is Tchaikovsky. I have failed as a father, truly. This is seppuku worthy.

The Pogues - Fairytale Of New York

MacDougall
Moto = 6
It started out kind of boring, but I like the lively part. There’s a lot of name calling.
QP = 6
They did a good job sounding drunk. Quite funny.
Epi = 6
My kids like name calling. The rotten bastards.
Amy Winehouse - Rehab

dunya
Moto = 8
This is very upbeat. Me likey, me likey. It gets better each time I hear it.
QP = 7
I think the brass is charming. I didn’t understand the lyrics at first, but extra listening helps with that.
Epi = 7.5
Gone too soon.

The Kinks, “Alcohol”

G-Man
Moto = 5
The lyrics don’t go with the tune. The singer sounds drunk. Not a big fan of the instruments. Nice ending.
QP = 8
Perfect dancing song. Makes me want to grab a trumpet and just go *imitates Miles*. Love the ending part.
Epi = 6.5
I probably have to be drunk to listen to The Kinks.

Nathaniel Rateliff & The Night Sweats - S.O.B.

Epi
Moto = 8
Very loud! The first time my dad heard this on the radio, he said “Are they playing Christian or Gospel music on the rock station now?”
QP = 7
Me and my cohost are very familiar with this song.
Epi = 7.5
SON OF A BITCH! GIVE ME A DRINK. Never mind I’ve got one already, but thanks.

The Devil Makes Three - "Old Number 7"

nutella
Moto = 7
Two seconds into it and I already like the guitar. The singer is 100% drunk. At the end it gave me a Mexican feel.
QP = 7
Somewhat country, I really liked the singer’s Western style. I was digging it from the start.
Epi = 7
Did you know they’re discontinuing my favorite cheap bourbon? RIP Evan Williams green label.

Merle Haggard - I Think I'll Just Stay Here And Drink

TonyStarkPrime
Moto = 8
I like the voice and the lead instruments a lot, especially the electric guitar.
QP = 7
Very country. I’m a big fan of country. When I’m in the car and get to pick the station I pick old country.
Epi = 7.5
Good ol’ Merle. That lead guitar cooks.

Sufjan Stevens, "Should Have Known Better"

Marmot
Moto = 9
The voice and the guitar are so good. Very calming. Definitely a 9.
QP = 9
Reminds me of island life. I’d listen to this before I go to bed. This song is a winner for me.
Epi = 9
“Island life.” What is that?
by Epignosis
Sun Mar 14, 2021 4:56 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Timeless
Spoiler: show

Fleetwood Mac – “The Chain”
MacDougall

Moto = 7
The bass solo was really cool, especially going with the drums.
QP = 5
The drums start out kind of like a heartbeat, and then it makes you want to dance. The guitar solo at the end was cool. The voices didn’t sound like they worked well together.
Epi = 6
Interesting. Praising the rhythm section. It’s almost like…I don’t know…like the bass player and the drummer should break off from this band and start a new band with their last names as the band name.
(The children agree. Queen Pink says “They’re too good for this band.”)



Alec Benjamin - Let Me Down Slowly
dunia

Moto = 8
There is a great tune to go with the lyrics. It gets a bit repetitive on one part. I don’t think there’s a lot of flaws with it. I like how the music is soft. I love pop songs.
QP = 8
I have not heard that one in a while. The problem with judging songs that I know is that I’ve never asked myself “What’s good and what’s bad about this?” And now I have to think.
Epi = 8
Not bad. Not my thing but not bad.


Pink Floyd – “Have a Cigar”
nijuukyugou

Moto = 7
All the instruments together sounded good. I agree with my sister that the synthesizer was cool.
QP = 6
It was really cool how it went like a wormhole at the end. I liked the synthesizer parts.
Epi = 6.5
I really don’t like Wish You Were Here much. I prefer The Final Cut. That’s right bitches.


Mariah Carey – “Always Be My Baby”
MyNameisNothing

Moto = 6
I get how my mom would like this. I didn’t care for the lyrics.
QP = 7
I have always loved Mariah Carey’s voice. She has such a broad range. The backup voices were cool.
Epi = 6.5
As the kids say these days, it’s been a minute since I’ve heard this one.



Paul Simon – “Graceland”
Boomslang

Moto = 8
The bass goes well with the drums. Multiple people singing together sound nice.
QP= 6
I’m trying to figure out what exactly the clapping sound is from. This sounds like rodeo music.
Epi = 7
That’s right folks. Paul Simon should give you the urge to mount a bull. Yee-haw.


The Allman Brothers Band – “Jessica”
Marmot

Moto = 6
The guitar players are great! My dad says this band has two drummers, which is cool.
QP = 6
My dad’s reaction was to pick up his guitar and play along. The lead guitar gives this a somewhat Hawaiian beachy vibe.
Epi = 6
True story: Another instrumental by The Allman Brothers Band, “In Memory of Elizabeth Reed” was inspired by a gravestone in a graveyard where members of the band would sometimes enjoy amorous encounters.


Pure Reason Revolution – “Deux Ex Machina”
Birdwithteeth11

Moto = 4
I hate the effects on the voice.
QP = 4
I feel like this is the opposite of whatever timeless is. Listening to it one time was enough.
Epi = 4
I don’t know why they didn’t just release an album on which they repeat “A million bright ambassadors of morning” ad nauseum. It worked for the album before this one.


Shearwater = “Animal Life”
nutella

Moto = 7
The singing is great. I felt like it was an extravagant song with lots of layers.
QP = 8
It sounds like they were banging on trash cans at one part. The singer has a very powerful voice. The buildup was a surprise for me.
Epi = 7.5
Simon says this is “eightworthy.”





The Ronettes – “Be My Baby”
G-Man

Moto = 5
Once again, I like the drums, but I didn’t like much else.
QP = 5
She has a nasal voice, which I don’t like. It’s like she’s holding her nose while she sings.
Epi = 5
I had to point out that the exaggerated cat eye look is not a new trend by any means.


Rick Astley – “Never Gonna Give You Up”
TonyStarkPrime

Moto = 6
Good dance music.
QP = 5
I’d play that at a party. Very 80s.
Epi = 5.5
Simon wants to know why we got Rickrolled.



Astrud Gilberto, João Gilberto and Stan Getz – “The Girl from Ipanema”
Epi

Moto = 9
I’ve heard this before and already knew I liked this song. I could listen to this multiple time without getting tired of it.
QP = 8
Without the words, this sounds like elevator music. Smooth sax. It’s kind of beautiful how the singer doesn’t quite sing English perfectly because it adds a sense of mystery.
Epi = 8.5
Protip: I can boost the score of my submission by playing mine right after birdwithteeth’s.
by Epignosis
Sun Mar 14, 2021 4:54 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Treasure
Spoiler: show
“Shiny”
MacDougall


Moto = 6
I don’t like how there’s talking in the middle of the song.
QP = 3
I don’t care for songs that have spoken word in them. Does the submitter treasure shiny stuff? The song was repetitive, though I did like the part that said, “Your grandmother lied.”
Epi = 4.5
I have no context, as I have not seen the movie, but now I’m sure that decision has been made for me.

“Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” – Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons
G-Man


Moto = 6
I don’t care for lovey-dovey songs. The saxophone was excellent though.
QP = 6
Frankie Valli expresses the lyrics beautifully. I usually don’t go for oldies, but it was an exceptional song. I guess whoever submitted this treasures a loved one.
Epi = 6
Kid’s just don’t appreciate the classics.


“The Diary of Horace Wimp” – ELO
nijuukyugou


Moto = 4
The sounds are annoying.
QP = 3
The high-pitched singing gave me a headache. The music was whacky but fun.
Epi = 3.5
Kids! Not only do they fail to recognize quality ELO, but they don’t remember my karaoke rendition last summer! (The girl insists she did remember I sang it and says it sounded better when I sang it. Ha! Take THAT, Jeff Lynne!)


“Ain't We Got Fun” – Liz Gillies Seth MacFarlane
TonyStarkPrime


Moto = 6
This is a different version than the one I usually listen to. It isn’t as good as the original.
QP = 7
This is going to get stuck in my head, but I don’t care! The lyrics are a fun update. “The rich get rich and the poor get blank” is a fun formula.
Epi = 6.5
Basically my 20s in a nutshell.

“My Favorite Things” – John Coltrane
Marmot


Moto = 3
Boring!!!!! Okay, that’s enough exclamation marks.
QP = 5
The saxophone playing was excellent, but I despise long instrumentals. I’m also used to the short version that has words, and this version lacks words, making it a monstrosity.
Epi = 4
This is the part of our program where I disown two of my children.

“Pleasure Little Treasure” – Depeche Mode
birdwithteeth11


Moto = 7
I liked the effects, but there’s too much going on at the same time.
QP = 6
I don’t feel like it goes with the theme. I like the synthetic bass.
Epi = 6.5
Simon came upstairs and asked, “Is this Tears for Fears?”

“I Shall Love 2” – Julia Holter
MyNameisNothing


Moto = 4
This is annoying. And repetitive.
QP = 2
Yeah, pretty annoying. I said repetitive first.
Epi = 3
I wouldn’t have lowballed it that bad, but yeah, I’m with the kids here.

“Something” – The Beatles
Boomslang


Moto = 8
Very upbeat. The tempo to the song is on point.
QP = 6
The music was good, but the vocals sounded funny to me.
Epi = 7
When the best thing you can say about that Beatles tune is that they got the tempo right, we’re all doomed.

“Vita Brevis” – Epignosis
Epi


Moto = 8
If this is dad, how dare he promote his own music! I love the music.
QP = 7
Okay, who submitted my dad? I love the echo effect. But what is it about? What is the treasure? Dad treasures his own music.
Epi = 7.5
I have a love/hate relationship with this artist.

“I Need My Girl” – The National
dunya


Moto = 7
Great tune to the lyrics. The guitar went well under the lyrics.
QP = 9
The singer was beautiful but something I noticed was that the drumming sounded like a heartbeat. The instruments complemented the singing well.
Epi = 8
I just kept singing “Let it Go” over this.


“My Life, My Love” – Family and Friends
nutella


Moto = 7
Soft and beautiful song. The drums and guitar were harmonious together.
QP = 9
It had a cool build-up, that’s for sure. The drums and violin bring the song together definitely.
Epi = 8
Sounds like a winner.
by Epignosis
Sun Mar 14, 2021 4:48 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Art
Spoiler: show
“The Art of Dying”
birdwithteeth11


Moto = 1
Horrible.
QP = 1
It’s like “I WANT COOKIES.” Whoever submitted this is just trying to torture two kids. At the beginning, there was a slight moment I thought this could be good. But no. The only thing this inspires me to do is turn it off.
Epi = 1
The girl’s Sesame Street reference has me pondering a new genre… Elmocore.


“Moon River”
TonyStarkPrime


Moto = 4
“Moo moo moo” cow noises. That’s all I hear. It’s boring and makes me want to fall asleep.
QP = 3
He’s got a nice voice, but this song is annoying and gives me a headache. A Capella is not my go to.
Epi = 3.5
I wish I owned that many shirts. If pressed to make this video, you’d see a bunch of Hoke County High School staff shirts.


“Fugue in G Minor”
Boomslang


Moto = 7
*At the beginning* “Ooo, techno!”
It reminds me of the time I went on the Ring of Fire at the fair.
QP = 4
This goes from haunted house music to carnival music.
Epi = 5.5
I’m like moto, but more like “Ooo Genesis! Can’t wait for the Mellotron and eventual guitar solo!”


“Nightmare”
Turnip Head


Moto = 3
I have no words. It’s horrible. What she said.
QP = 3
Very inappropriate. We’re kids goshdangit.
Epi = 3
On the other hand, this video makes me thankful for the shirts I *do* have.


“Teachers”
MacDougall


Moto = 8
It’s dark if you pay attention to the lyrics. The repeating fluttering of the guitar pleased me.
QP = 9
It’s a sad beautiful tune. It makes me feel like a butterfly flying away.
Epi = 8.5
*“It goes like this, the fourth the fifth, the minor fa-“* Oh, sorry, what were we listening to again?


“Life in Technicolor”
G-Man


Moto = 6
The buildup is beautiful. It’s short. I wish there were words.
QP = 4
It’s beautiful, but the start kind of bores me. It didn’t really inspire me. There’s nothing to it emotionally to me.
Epi = 5
Damn kids don’t understand the value of an instrumental introduction. I should lock them in a closet and make them listen to *The Snow Goose* on repeat for 48 hours.


“Winter”
Nijuukyugou


Moto = 7
Reminds me of a ballet recital.
QP = 7
If I had a ballet troupe, I’d make a routine to this.
Epi = 7
Damn, now I *really* need to get the string on that violin replaced…


Raindrop in my Skull
nutella


Moto = 8
Dark, but the voice is beautiful with the build up to the drums. The violinist did a great job.
QP = 8
This song made me wish my dad didn’t suck at the violin. It’s a nice mix of melodies. The beachy bends bring it all together.
Epi = 8
Oof. Burn.


“Dance PM”
MyNameisNothing


Moto = 2
I think I know how this was made. The person did the keyboard part and then repeated it with copy and pasting.
QP = 4
Gentle like a lullaby but way too repetitive for me.
Epi = 3
That introduction had me ready to play some FTL. Damn it. Have to host this shit.


Tennis Court
dunia


Moto = 3
I hate it so much that I don’t know what to say.
QP = 2
I didn’t understand what this was about. Is it a competition? The lyrics make no sense. Who talks on the tennis court? Why not the golf course? People talk on the golf course.
Epi = 2.5
Holy shit! All I need to do to get 120 million views on my Youtube channel is wear mauve lipstick, a fishnet top, and occasionally mouth “YEAH?” Sign me up!

“I Talk to the Wind”
Epi


Moto = 8
I’ve heard this song before, and it has always been an artistic song to me.
QP = 7
Such a harmonious song. The woodwinds bring it all together. It makes me want to twerk.
Epi = 7.5
My children were actually twerking to this. I do not know what to say. Not Simon though. Simon lacks an ass.

“Summer of ‘42”
Marmot


Moto = 9
Beautiful voice. Harmonious, it makes me want to dance.
QP = 9
Very classical. It builds up and definitely inspires me to make art.
Epi = 9
I, too, enjoyed Jónsi’s side project very much.
by Epignosis
Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:56 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

I need to update this thread too. Whoops.
by Epignosis
Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:38 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

This is on tonight at 7pm EST.

@nutella
@MacDougall
@dunya
@MyNameIsNothing
@birdwithteeth11
@nijuukyugou
@Boomslang
@Marmot
@TonyStarkPrime
@G-Man
by Epignosis
Sun Jan 31, 2021 4:41 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Food
Spoiler: show
“Cheeseburger in Paradise”
Epi

Moto = 7
I really like the vibe. I love medium rare steak. This is reminding me of patty melts. Me likey, me likey.
QP = 8
Very groovy. I’m glad I’m eating because this song is making me hungry.
Epi = 7.5
I am not ashamed to admit that I like Jimmy Buffett.

“Don’t Eat the Yellow Snow”
Marmot

Moto = 6
My favorite part was the yellow snow part at the end. I didn’t really like it that much.
QP = 5
The backup singers brought everything together, but I didn’t like it that much.
Epi = 5.5
Actual quote from Frank Zappa about my hometown:
“For the records, folks: I never took a shit on stage, and the closest I ever came to eating shit anywhere was at a Holiday Inn buffet in Fayetteville, North Carolina, in 1973.”

“PPAP”
dunia

Moto = 5
I have no words.
QP = 7
Yaaaaass. PEN PINEAPPLE APPLE PEN!
Epi = 6.5
The fact that this has three and a half million views and the entirety of Kind of Blue has less than 100,000k is a testimony to the degeneration of the world.

“Eat It”
G-Man

Moto = 7
It makes you want to throw up but at the same time is makes you want to eat. It would have been better if this was “Beat It.”
QP = 7
This song was funny. It’s like he’s the world’s parent.
Epi = 7
It would *not* have been better if this was “Beat It.” Go Al. I respect your game.

“Olives”
birdwithteeth11

Moto = 5
Sounds like something straight out of Bioshock. I can barely understand the singer with the effects. My ears are bleeding!
QP = 3
I hate olives. I hate the whole vibe with all the edited noises. Are we allowed to skip?
Epi = 4
On the one hand, I don’t care much for this. On the other, I’ve never heard this entire album and this only encourages me to check it out.

“Ice Cream Man”
TonyStarkPrime

Moto = 4
It’s rocky, a lot of screaming, and I don’t know what’s happening the song.
QP = 4
This reminded me of “Move It on Over” by George Thoroughgood and The Destroyers (Editor’s note: I had to point out who covered that, but she knew the song from the radio). It gave me a headache. I expect a song about ice cream to be calmer.
Epi = 4
RIP EVH

“The Ballad of Mr. Steak”
nutella

Moto = 5
I liked the keyboards and drums together. The singing sounded like it was too edited.
QP = 6
This is a strange combination of genres. For some reason it made me think of “Alice in Wonderland.”
Epi = 5.5
When you can make an electric violin sound smoother than Moog runs, you have my respect.

The Noisy Eater
MyNameisNothing

Moto = 5
It’s hard to understand what the children are saying. I don’t really like rap.
QP = 6
I think we all know a messy eater in our lives. It was hard to hear things over the effects and noises in the backgrounds. However, one of my favorites was the chomps.
Epi = 5.5
Simon says this sounds like a Warner Bros. rap song. I agree.

“Fatback”
The Waltons

Moto = 5
I found it repetitive a little bit. I liked the bass though.
QP = 7
It really reflects how much a mama does. The bass and the drums worked well together, and this reflects the category well.
Epi = 6
That’s good eatin’ right there. I don’t care who you are.

“Banana Pancakes”
MacDougall

Moto = 8
I love the tune. I want my dad to play this on his guitar. Since this is calming, it makes you think of all the different pancakes. I want to dance to this.
QP = 9
I’m in love already. It makes me think of hot butter melting over pancakes. It’s got the breakfast feel.
Epi = 8.5
You’ll never hear an argument from me about Jack Johnson.
by Epignosis
Sun Jan 17, 2021 10:52 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

School
Spoiler: show
“Popular”
G-Man

Moto = 6
I liked the part where it said, “Wash your hair once every two weeks.” The “Johnny Football” part was hilarious.
QP = 8
The rapping part was really funny. I slid off my seat. And the music made me want to dance.
Epi = 7
This sounded like Deadpool shouting into a microphone.

“Another Brick in the Wall (Part 2)”
Marmot

Moto = 7
I’ve heard this song before, and I like it. The children singing part was cute. I thought the guitar and bass players were good.
QP = 7
I think it really represents the theme. All in all it was a really great song.
Epi = 7
The fade out would lose four points for me.

“Cannibal”
Turnip Head

Moto = 3
I have no words. This is horrible. I agree that the lyrics are cringe.
QP = 4
This song has a nice build up, but I’m not a big fan overall. The lyrics are cringe.
Epi = 3.5
Indigestion in audio format.

“Hot for Teacher”
TonyStarkPrime

Moto = 5
Cringe. My dad looked like he was going to poke me with a pencil when the guy said, “Give me something to write on.”
QP = 6
When I saw the name of the song, I was like “CRINGE!” And my only question was, “How young is the teacher?” And I thought the baby on the cover had a pack of crayons, not cigarettes!
Epi = 5.5
Still laughing about waving that pencil around. Not going to lie.

“Schooldays”
Epi

Moto = 7
I liked the tune of the song and how the lyrics were put together. And I also liked how it kept making you fall asleep and then waking you up. Just like school!
QP = 8
I thought it was nice and calm, it was really enchanting, and I think it’s a work of art. It made me want to make a dance to it. Gentle Giant should be really proud.
Epi = 7.5
Surprise bitches. I’m in this. Deal with it.

“A Certain Romance”
nijuukyugou

Moto = 8
The sound of the bass and the other instruments made me want to sing. I liked the lyrics.
QP = 6
I don’t really know how I feel about that one. I got this beach vibe from the music, and that I liked.
Epi = 7
That bass line. Mmm mmm mmm.

“Learning to Live”
Boomslang

Moto = 6
At first, before the lyrics started, I wanted to turn it down. But once the lyrics started, I wanted to turn it up. The drums, keyboard, and guitar sounded really harmonious together. At the end, I started to get a bit of a headache.
QP = 4
At first, I wanted to avoid listening to the song because of the length. And my first impression of it was “Oh God, I have to listen to eleven more minutes of this?” But once the words started, it got a little bit more beautiful, but it’s still not my style.
Epi = 5
As I said, I might have underappreciated this album. Will have to dig it back out.

“Campus”
Nutella

Moto = 6
I liked the guitar player. He did a good job.
QP = 6
The lyrics are realistic. The guitar really caught my attention. And I loved the drums.
Epi = 6
You got a six.

“Teenage Dirtbag”
MacDougall

Moto = 7
I didn’t like this much at first, but now it appeals to me. I like the rhymes.
QP = 7
I really enjoyed it. It was funny with the part of the girl and the Iron Maiden tickets.
Epi = 7
Jesus these kids.

“Criminals”
MyNameisNothing

Moto = 8
This song made me feel calm. I agree with my sister. I really liked it.
QP = 7
*Applause* I wanted to sing along even if I didn’t know the words. I liked the balance between the guitar and the singing. I would like to know what kind of guitar is being played.
Epi = 7.5
This has a Bob Dylan vibe, and I don’t like Bob Dylan. But I like this. Good picking. The frequencies on the vocals need attention, but whatever. Cool shit.

“Basket Case”
Dunya

Moto = 6
It was really catchy. That’s what I really liked about it. It was really catchy.
QP = 6
Well the music was kind of a hammer to the skull to me, but it was kind of catchy. And to be fair, I’m not really into rock music.
Epi = 6
Green Day will always be about a six. Feet Under.

“Everyone I Went to High School With is Dead”
birdwithteeth11

Moto = 4
What is this? *Begins laughing maniacally* My favorite part of this was laughing at my sister groaning. So I give it a 4.
QP = 0
*Seven seconds in* I hate it already. *Grimaces painfully* My least favorite part was everything. Turn it off! Turn it off!
Epi = 2
I agree kids. Walk away slowly, and then head for the hills.
by Epignosis
Sun Jan 17, 2021 6:40 pm
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

Re: MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

@nutella
@MacDougall
@Turnip Head
@dunya
@MyNameIsNothing
@birdwithteeth11
@nijuukyugou
@Boomslang
@Marmot
@TonyStarkPrime
@G-Man

One of the categories shall be revealed this evening in Discord. 7pm EST. :dark:

If you were not mentioned above and should be mentioned for this, please let me know. I think this is everyone.
by Epignosis
Sun Dec 20, 2020 10:11 am
Forum: Tin Pan Alley
Topic: [WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus
Replies: 22
Views: 14155

[WALRUS] MyChildrenAreHorriblerus

Queen Pink Categories:

1. A Suicide Song. A song about killing yourself.
2. An Art Song. A song that inspires you to make art.
3. A Timeless Song. A song that no matter how much your hear it it never gets old.
4. A Treasure Song. A song that represents your treasure.

motobot Categories:

5. Alcoholism. I want a song that reminds me of people with alcohol addiction.
6. Crime. A Song about crime.
7. School. A Song that makes you think about school.
8. Food. A Song that makes you want food.

PM your links to me here, and let's try to have them by 12/30.

Scores

MacDougall =_______ 7.0 + 8.5 + 8.5 + 4.5 + 6.0 + 6.0 + 4.0 + 0 = 44.5
Marmot =___________ 7.0 + 5.5 + 9.0 + 4.0 + 6.0 + 9.0 + 7.0 + 0 = 47.5
G-Man =____________ 7.0 + 7.0 + 5.0 + 6.0 + 5.0 + 6.5 + 6.5 + 0 = 43
nutella =__________ 6.0 + 5.5 + 8.0 + 8.0 + 7.5 + 7.0 + 6.5 + 0 = 48.5
nijuukyugou =______ 7.0 + 6.0 + 7.0 + 3.5 + 6.5 + 7.5 + 6.0 + 0 = 43.5
Boomslang =________ 5.0 + 6.0 + 5.5 + 7.0 + 7.0 + 5.0 + 6.5 + 0 = 42
MyNameisNothing =__ 7.5 + 5.5 + 3.0 + 3.0 + 6.5 + 6.0 + 7.5 + 0 = 39
dunya = ___________ 6.0 + 6.5 + 2.5 + 8.0 + 8.0 + 7.5 + 6.5 + 0 = 45
Epignosis =________ 7.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 8.5 + 7.5 + 7.0 + 0 = 53
TonyStarkPrime =___ 5.5 + 4.0 + 3.5 + 6.5 + 5.5 + 7.5 + 7.5 + 0 = 40
birdwithteeth11 =__ 2.0 + 4.0 + 1.0 + 6.5 + 4.0 + 5.0 + 2.0 + 0 = 24.5

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